


There is no such thing as vampires

by clockworkgraystairs



Series: Jurdan Smut Week 2020 by Jurdannet [2]
Category: The Folk of the Air - Holly Black
Genre: F/M, That's it, Vampire AU, a family trip and a haunted castle, human jude, i slept only 3 hours so this better be worth it, jurdansmutweek2020, who doesn't enjoy a vampire au?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-27
Updated: 2021-01-01
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:21:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,902
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26144785
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clockworkgraystairs/pseuds/clockworkgraystairs
Summary: Written for Jurdan Smut Week"Behind me stands a tall, slender man dressed in black trousers and one of those puffy white shirts men always use in period TV dramas. Raven curls frame the sharp angles of his face and his pale skin resembles marble. I stare at him unsure if my eyes widen because of the scare or how good looking he is. Maybe both.His lips curve as if he finds my reaction somehow satisfying."
Relationships: Jude Duarte/Cardan Greenbriar
Series: Jurdan Smut Week 2020 by Jurdannet [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1894948
Comments: 46
Kudos: 156





	1. Lost castles

**Author's Note:**

  * For [slightlyrebelliouswriter](https://archiveofourown.org/users/slightlyrebelliouswriter/gifts).



> Written for Jurdan Smut Week 2020
> 
> The original prompt was dagger play...and look, I tried but the story didn't flow that way. There is a mention of some daggers tho.
> 
> How about fang play instead?? Or whatever this is...
> 
> Here are the ambience music videos I listened to while writing this, in case you want to use them to read:  
> -Rain in a forest at night: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x7SQaDTSrVg&t=1606s  
> -Haunted mansion/rain/thunder/wind: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sCgqiOzXE-g  
> -Narnia Lullaby: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zpJ_UJNmnwM&t=1613s

“Please tell me again why are we doing this?” I ask for the third time, leaning to rest my head on my sister’s shoulder. We bounce as the uncomfortable van we travel in turns to a cobbled path, leading us deeper into the woods. 

“Because,” Vivi hisses back. “Your little brother is currently in his Twilight-obsession phase, and he just broke up with his girlfriend so we’re trying to cheer him up!”

“He’s 9! And they lasted like, what? Four hours?”

In that moment, Oak turns violently from the front seat, scowling at me. “First of all Jude, we were together _two full days_ ok? She was the love of my life and suddenly she’s not sure about us anymore? Now I shall never find love again! I might have to become a priest. I expect a little consideration.”

Vivi ruffles his hair affectionately. “We absolutely understand, your sister here doesn’t have an ounce of romance in her veins but of course she supports the cause.”

That said, he returns to his place. I bite my lip hard, trying not to laugh. Typical Oak. I love my brother I really do, even if half of the time I can’t understand his dramatic outbursts.

Sighing, I stare through the window, to the heavy clouds gathering on top of us. Great. We are probably far away from the highway by now, nothing more than trees, rocks and occasional wild animals around. For some reason, our father had thought that there was no better way of fixing a kid’s broken heart than going on a quest in search of legends and hidden castles. 

The thing is that apparently, it works. Instead of an incessant whining about love being doomed, my brother spends the days throwing the most random facts about werewolves, vampires, ghosts and any impossible creature. To be honest, I don’t think wikipedia and the Twilight books are a reliable source, but if it makes Oak happy I could live a couple of days with it. And most importantly if I have to choose between this or spending the week back at home with my mother and twin sister going to tea parties for old ladies, well, the answer is very clear.

I remember reading a few books about myths when I was younger. When I turned fifteen, I developed a hard crush on Brad Pitt after I saw Interview with the Vampire, filling half of the walls in my room with posters of him. Even now ten years later, I actually enjoy talking about old folklore and legends, urban myths and stuff like that. 

What bugs me, are the fraudulent morons who want to take advantage of Oak’s naive curiosity to engage us in the most ridiculous tours that were obviously a waste of money. So far, we’d entered three “museums” where most of the so-called relics were made of plastic, and a haunted house with special effects so poorly done, father had discreetly asked for his money back. Only another two of the places we visited were actually interesting, but since the guides spent most of the time flirting with Vivi or me, it had annoyed our father. 

Now though, we are driving behind the car of an old couple who swore their ancestors owned a castle where true vampires had lived once. The sole mention of the word “castle” was enough to make Oak hang from our father’s sleeve begging to go.

I’m not going to lie, it is an intriguing idea. But I remain a little worried about how much money Madoc is ready to pay before he hurries his little son back to his fantasy books and videogames.

“Dad, did you know that vampires like to live in the woods because it allows them to make racing competitions without being interrupted?” Oak asks with enthusiasm.

Madoc gasps. “Do they? Is it because they’re so fast?” 

Okay, he might be willing to pay more than I thought. Next to me, Vivi muffles a laugh and keeps taking pictures for her instagram, occasionally asking for my help.

Upon arriving at the castle I have to suppress a curse. _This,_ now, is a real castle. Nothing like the pitiful buildings we’d visited before. It is huge, made of pure stone and a modest wooden bridge that connects the entrance with the spot where the cars park. A slight fog covers the sides of the castle giving it a creepier look. 

A shiver goes down my back. I turn to find my family who are all equally gaping at the place in front of them. Oak is visibly shaking with excitement. Vivi shoots me an astonished look before taking my brother’s hand and following the couple across the bridge. 

The first thought that pops into my mind is that this place must have been taken out from a movie. Or set up for one. Maybe this is one of those pranks for TV. There is no other explanation for the massive room we find behind the giant front gate. Every inch of the walls is covered by paintings, several images barely recognizable through the dust. Aged furniture rests under dust and spiderwebs, pointing out they haven’t been used in quite some time. The illumination doesn’t help either. Electric lights hang from a few spots on the walls, though not enough for the big space, which I suspect is the reason that long candles are lit up too. 

My next thought is that I should’ve brought my sweater. The damn place is freezing. 

“Phew, sorry about the dust!” The old man says, flashing an embarrassed smile to us. “We were not planning to have any visitors yet.”

“You said this is going to be a museum?” Madoc asks, carefully surveying the walls. Next to him, Vivi tightens her hold on my brother’s hand to prevent him from starting to run around. I swear his eyes are about to pop out of their sockets. 

“It will indeed! This place has been in our family for generations, but since it’s hard to adapt it to modern technology it was abandoned.” He turns to Oak and winks. “Not to mention the creepy things that happen here all the time.”

His gaze widens. “What kind of things?”

“Well, some distant relatives used to try spending their vacations here. But after a couple of days they left in a big rush, claiming some strange force had commanded them to go away.” With a lower voice, he adds. “They also mentioned noises coming out from empty rooms and dark hallways. Steps. Shadows that followed them along the place.” 

For a second everyone remains silent. The only noise I can hear is the wind outside and the start of a slight rain. Somehow my hands are even colder.

“The legend says,” The woman, whose name is Marrow if I remember it correctly, continues while taking one chandelier with her hand. “This was the hideout of ancient vampires, how many, we don’t know. But they didn’t appreciate people trying to live within their domains.”

“So why come here at all?” Vivi asks. “Isn’t it dangerous?”

“It might be.” She shrugs. “But that’s half of the fun, isn’t it?”

“We like to think we’ve found a safe way to open this castle to the public without taking any risks. We will use a part of it as a museum, to show some of the family relics. But be aware, no one is allowed to go further than the marked area.” He signals at the yellow tape stuck on the floor forming arrows.

“If you please...” Marrow says, motioning at the stairs where the markings start.

They get me for a moment, not gonna lie. The surroundings and the way they speak are creepy enough to make me doubt my beliefs for a second. I shake my head to clear those thoughts away and walk behind my family. There’s no such thing as vampires or haunted castles.

We go through passages. Madoc has to remind Oak to not touch anything, constantly. From what I see, he’s living his best day. Several counters line up side by side against the wall. Some of them contain jewelry, others weapons, old writing pens among other things. Most of them carry a family shield, although it’s too blurry to properly identify what it says.

The rain thickens outside and Marrow keeps talking. She tells the story of her so called ancestors, whose family were big enough to fill all the rooms in the castle. Elwen, Eldred… something like that, and his many wives had once lived here. Along with his abounding children. I see in Oak’s face the intention to ask about how that family arrangement worked but Vivi gives him a slight pull of his hair. 

I would have thought our guides would try to keep a proud name for their so-called ancestors. But they don’t. In fact, she seems particularly interested in explaining how Eldred’s cruel and terrible nature brought him nothing but disgrace. His once prosperous castle and assets were gone little by little. He claimed he was under the effects of a curse, but no one dared believing him. At least not until people started disappearing.

I stop listening at some point, focusing my attention on the relics in front of me. I’ve always felt a significant attraction to weapons, but not the ordinary ones like guns or rifles. These ones though, such beautiful daggers and swords. I’d give a kidney just to hold one of them. 

On the next shelf books pile one next to the other, the dust around them a clear sign of how long they’ve been unbothered. All except for one. The navy blue cover has almost no dust at all, yet it looks like it would fall apart with a gentle blow of wind. The title is partially gone, probably through time. 

I turn my head to my family but they’re gone, probably to another corridor since I can still hear the muffled voice of Marrow and my brother. Would she care at all if I check out that book?

I bite my lip. As long as it doesn’t break it’s probably alright. Standing on the tip of my toes I reach for it.

“That is an excellent book.” 

I shriek and whip around, my hand flies to my mouth trying to cover the embarrassing sound. The book falls open next to my feet.

Behind me stands a tall, slender man dressed in black trousers and one of those puffy white shirts men always use in period TV dramas. Raven curls frame the sharp angles of his face and his pale skin resembles marble. I stare at him unsure if my eyes widen because of the scare or how good looking he is. Maybe both. 

His lips curve as if he finds my reaction somehow satisfying. “My personal favorite. Too bad the author was a poisonous bunch-backed toad.”

My mouth opens to apologize, but I only manage to let out a strangled. “Shit”

The stranger lifts an eyebrow and chuckles. 

“Sorry, I- that wasn’t what I meant to say.” I stutter. I feel as if my heart has jumped to my throat. “I wasn’t trying to steal the book.”

“I did not say you were.” He answers, his voice is like velvet.

I nod and take a deep breath. “I came in with my family. Marrow is showing us the place.”

His dark eyes wander down my body, but not like one of those rude men on the streets. No. Something in his gaze feels feral, like an animal sizing up his prey. A strange urge to run pools in my stomach, yet at the same time my muscles seem to have forgotten how to do so. 

He looks me in the eyes again and it’s all gone. I let go of the tension in my back and a breath I didn’t know I was holding. When he smiles again, I feel as if I could trust him. Why shouldn’t I?

“And are you enjoying the tour?” He bends to pick up the book I’d dropped before and puts it back on the shelf. His movements are fluid and carefree. I doubt I’ve ever seen such elegance in a simple action. It is unsettling as much as it is attractive. Then I realize I’m supposed to answer.

“Yes, this is amazing actually.” I look around and take in the aged stone of the walls and ceiling. In that corridor there’s only one electric lamp, the rest is only lightened by candles. I can see our shadows dancing along to the flames. “All of this really helps getting in the ‘mood’.”

“The mood?” 

I look at him and notice his tilted head. “Yeah you know, the mood of enchanted castles and old legends. This is well put enough that a credulous person would believe any story. Marrow is pretty good at it too.” Motioning a hand to him I add. “They even have their own actor.”

A thunder roars outside. “I beg your pardon?”

I roll my eyes and flash him a smile. “You don’t really have to keep the charade with me. I’m not some schoolgirl.”

“Yet I managed to pull a scream out of you, didn’t I?” The way he says it feels as if he was talking about an entirely different subject. Heat creeps up my cheeks.

“That was… not the same.” I mumble. “I didn’t hear you approaching. That could scare the living hell out of anybody.”

“I have been told I am quite sneaky, I concede you that.” He nods. “Why don’t I give you the rest of the tour? As an apology, of course.”

 _He’s doing his job_ , I remind myself, _he’s not flirting with you_. 

“You haven’t even told me your name.” I say. “If we’re roaming around a castle together I should at least know who’s guiding me.”

That sounded an awful lot like flirting. Dammit. 

“Cardan, at your service madam.” The tone he uses feels like a caress. He bows his head in a way I’ve only seen in movies. He takes his role seriously. I almost chuckle, but the sound dies in my throat. 

“Cardan.” I repeat, just for the pleasure of doing it. “My name is Jude.”

He straightens. “Delighted to meet your acquaintance.” He answers and offers me his arm. “Shall we, Jude?” 

I can’t believe how far away my family has gone. Cardan and I walk through a couple of corridors and still there is no trace of them. Did we take that long talking?

He’s an excellent guide, I have to acknowledge that. 

While Marrow uses a tone of suspense and mystery, Cardan has this melancholy in his voice that sounds as if he’s talking about a memory. It’s bewitching. He also drops the most ridiculous “facts” about the people on the paintings. I refrain myself from asking if inventing things is allowed for employees, because saying that the girl with the pearl necklace enjoyed to play on the beach while saying she was the Princess of the Sea, certainly sounds like it. 

“If you bite your lip one more time, I am going to do it for you.” 

My heart skips a bit and I let go of my lower lip. I hadn’t realized I was tugging it. It’s an unconscious habit. I turn to him and I find his gaze different, hungry. It sends a shiver down to a place I know it shouldn’t. He arches an eyebrow as though he notices.

“Is that a thing vampires like to do?” I say, trying to lighten the mood. The last thing I want him to know is that for the last twenty minutes I’ve been listening to him speak wishing he put a different use to that wicked mouth of his.

His gaze doesn’t change. “It is a thing I would like to do.” 

I am pretty sure my expression is giving me up by now. Knowing my traitorous body, I’m probably flushed, my mouth open in awe. Desire coils inside me.

At my lack of answer, he continues. “Why don’t I show you something vampires _really_ like to do?” 

He walks back without letting go of my hand. I notice he steps out from the marked section and into a forbidden corridor. 

The sensation returns, the one that is telling me to run. The problem is that I don’t know whether to run away, or straight to it. My mind wants both and my body, only one.

“You’re going to the restricted area.” I’m partially surprised by how breathless my voice sounds. “You can’t go in there…”

Cardan pauses and a confused expression crosses his face. A second later, it returns to his charming and teasing smile. “Are you afraid?”

I am. 

Yet, I don’t care. I walk into the shadows with him.

As we cross the passage darkened by the lack of chandeliers I tell myself this is a terrible, terrible idea. The way he devours my mouth the moment a door slams shut behind us, convinces me it is the best.

Cardan pushes me against the wall, the cold temperature of the stone goes through my clothes making me gasp. He takes the opportunity and kisses me harder, his tongue explores my mouth with such deliciousness I have to bite back a moan. 

My fingers are tangled in his hair pulling him closer to me, if such a thing is even possible. His hands are everything but still. They roam intensely from my breasts, down my sides and finally to my rear, where he grabs me, pressing me against his pelvis. I hear him groan and the sound makes something clench inside me. 

Before I can double-think about it, one of my hands lowers to rub his hardness, still hidden behind his trousers. His breath hitches. He pulls back a bit and whispers to my ear. “Needy little human.”

I frown a moment, something about his words not clicking inside my brain but whatever it is I forget it the moment he slides his cold hands under my jersey. I yelp at the sensation, not sure if what flutters down my back is a result of the temperature or the eagerness which he’s holding me with. When he reaches my bra I hesitate for a moment. Cardan pauses too and leans back to stare into my eyes. 

“Do you want to stop?” His voice is throaty and charged with desire. Still, he doesn’t make a move, waiting for my answer.

An instinctive part of me knows this is something I shouldn’t be doing. But that’s definitely not any close to me wanting to stop. Without removing my eyes from his I take the hem of my jersey to pull it over my head. The piece of fabric hits the floor, but neither of us pays attention to it. Once again Cardan’s gaze roams me in that predatory way. 

I don’t stagger this time.

When my bra falls to the floor too, I take his hand and guide it to my jean’s button. “Do I look like I want to stop?”

Without hesitation he yanks the button open and slides his hand inside to cup the apex of my thighs. The contrast of my warm skin against his coldness makes my hips buck. Cardan buries his other hand in my hair and tilts my head back. I can feel his lips nipping down my jaw and my neck. A moan escapes my lips as he swipes a finger along my heat. He hums in response, the vibrations of it against my neck makes my eyes roll back.

He continues his ministrations until he feels me wet enough to slide a finger inside, he curls and pulls out. Then back inside. My breath comes out in elaborated pants as he quickens his pace. My hands almost finish unbuttoning his shirt when he slides another finger through my folds, his movements turn fast and punishing. Wet sounds taint the silence around us. As pleasure takes full control of my body I cling to him like a life saver, trying to muffle my moans.

“Let go Jude, let go for me.” He breathes next to my ear. My back arches and I sob a curse, writhing down on his hand. 

He slows down as I come back from my orgasm, but never stops. Despite the freezing surroundings a drop of sweat runs down my chest. My heart beats as if I just ran a marathon. Cardan’s lazy moves continue, frequently grazing that spot that makes me mewl.

I hear him sigh. “You smell so good.” He claims my mouth one more time and bites me hard enough to make me wince. His tongue caresses my lower lip and a warm throb expands through my veins. He freezes and pulls back, releasing me. I stare at him in confusion, or at least as much as I can manage giving my current state.

He pants a couple of times before looking up at me. There’s a fiercess in his eyes that would’ve been scary under normal situations, right now, it only makes me want him more. He swallows before finally speaking. “If we go further, I won’t be able to stop.” His voice is like sandpaper.

My body seems to work on its own account, as I move to cup his face between my hands. “I already told you.”

“Jude…” He warns me, but I interrupt him joining my lips to his.

“I want this.” I breathe into his mouth. Cardan lets out a defeated groan before pulling my body back against his. Either he’s been holding back or it is until that moment that I realize how strong he actually is. He kisses me like a starved man and I can feel my pulse rise once again.

Soon his shirt joins my other clothing. My fingers trace his chest and torso, marveled at the softness of his skin. I mimic him moments before and kiss his neck. A low sound that almost resembles a growl comes out from his throat. My hands travel lower.

Somehow I manage to free his raging erection from his trousers, closing my hand around him. He hisses and then tilts his hips up to my touch. I start pumping him with unsure movements before gaining confidence to do it harder, tighter. Now it’s his turn to curse. Even though it sounds like something taken out from a Shakespeare novel, it makes my core pulse. 

Cardan grips the hem of my jeans strong enough that for a moment I fear he’d rip them away. 

“Take these off.” He demands instead.

I’m not sure of how I manage to do it. My mind feels blurred with a mix of sensations. Disoriented, not sure about exactly how my body is doing all of that, and the bliss of knowing I’m enjoying every second of it.

Before the air hits my skin, Cardan lifts me from the ground. My legs circle his waist in a reflexive move. His lips quirk in approval. Then my back is once again pressed against the wall, making me arch in a failed attempt to avoid touching the cold stone. A sound leaves my mouth, though it is not clear if it’s a protest or a moan. I hear him chuckle in my ear and I turn my head, searching his lips. 

His kiss is slower but still deep. I feel as if small electric sparks are tickling every single one of my nerves. More, I need more. Cardan holds me in place with his hips, letting his hands wander up and down my legs.

The tip of his shaft is grazing my core over the thin fabric of my remaining piece of clothing, with an aching slowness that is not enough to ease my thirst. _More._

I might have said that out loud because Cardan’s hips grind faster against me. It feels so good. And yet, it’s not enough.

I whine his name like a plea. 

He continues for a couple of torturing seconds before reaching between my thighs again. There’s no teasing now as he moves my panties aside and immediately sinks his fingers inside me, pumping in and out with a pace that has me gasping in no time. He murmurs something I can’t understand and lines himself up to my entrance.

With soft, deliberate movements he slides through my heat, letting me feel every inch of him until he’s completely filling me. Then he stills. My muscles twitch around him, trying to adjust to the invasion. The exquisiteness of it is making my head swoon. 

Cardan grabs my jaw and locks his gaze with mine. I can imagine what he’s looking at. Hooded eyes and flushed skin, though he doesn’t let me think a lot about it as he starts to move. Slow at first, with careful strokes that quickly evolve into long and deep. My mouth falls open at the sensation and my eyes shut.

“I warned you.” I hear him pant. “That there was no coming back.”

A whimper escapes my lips. I’m not even sure I’m actually trying to say something. He doesn’t seem to care either and leans to whisper to my ear. “You are mine now, Jude.” 

There is something in the way he says it, his words carrying some compelling implication I can’t fully catch. His lips trail down my neck and I want to answer. To tell him that I am, that after the way he’s taking me, how could it be otherwise? 

That’s when I feel a sharp stinging pain on the base of my throat. 

I cry out and try to shake it away but whatever it is won’t let me go. Cardan’s words echo at the back of my mind, _Needy little human._

As if sensing my thoughts he grabs my thighs and opens them wider, he thrusts into me harder and faster. Everything mixes in sensation. Pain leaves as fast as it came, leaving behind it that throb in my veins I can’t really explain. It is more intense now, what I felt as warm now is scorching. My entire body feels like it’s on fire, I’ve never felt so exhilarated before in my life. I don’t want it to stop. 

Cardan sucks on my neck again and I moan his name. Without realizing it, I’m on the brink of another orgasm. I only realize it because he groans when my legs start to shiver around him. I cling to his neck and his hair. If I’m pulling too hard I can’t really know. A familiar swirl comes up from my core to the rest of my body as I spasm around him. It takes me a moment to notice the broken moans and sobs I hear come from my own mouth. 

He keeps going a little longer until his fingers tighten over my skin, surely leaving bruises on both thighs. Muffled moans ring against my skin as he comes, thrusting in a couple of times more before stilling. A warm sensation covers the place where we join together. His mouth lets go of my neck. I grunt and shiver. 

He puts me down carefully, still holding my waist, which is good considering I don’t know if I’m able to stand by myself. I feel dizzy. Cardan lowers his lips to mine one more time. He’s slow and gentle as though he’s worried. There is a slightly metallic taste in his tongue but I don’t pay attention to it. I trace the fine features of his face with trembling fingers. Little by little my senses start to take in the surroundings, the cold. 

The place rumbles with another crack of thunder.

“You have to go back.” Cardan says, barely pulling his lips apart. Go back. I frown, then images of my family crash in my mind. I look around searching for the door, there is something on the floor. I realize soon those are my clothes. Shit. The tour, Oak. How much time have I been gone?

I dress in a hurry, not really caring if I put on my jersey correctly. He does the same but with the calm an elegance he has.

Panic must be written in my face because he grabs my chin and turns me to him. “Hey. Calm down.” He soothes me. Then his tone changes, turns commanding. His eyes are darker too. “Listen to me. You are going to do exactly as I say, do you understand Jude?”

I want to ask why, but for some reason I only nod. Cardan grabs my hand and pulls me out of whatever room we were in. “You must follow this passage until you find a way to turn left. Then continue until you see a painting of a black snake then turn right, you cannot miss it or you will get lost. Walk straight, and you will be back to a safe area.”

“But-” I start. I don’t want to go alone. And I don’t understand why but I don’t want to separate from him either. Which is nonsense, I barely know him and still...

He interrupts me. “I cannot go with you, I have lost so much control already and I don’t think…” 

“Cardan, I can’t-” 

A growl echoes in his chest and he pulls me closer to him. While his voice is still hypnotizing it sounds threatening now. “You will not tell anybody about what you saw here. Now go if you intend to leave this place alive.”

Then he's gone. I can’t recall if I blinked or turned, because a moment before I could still touch him and now he vanished.

I take a deep breath and start walking. Focus. Go straight, then turn right. Or was it left? 

All passages look the same, some spaces don’t even have a painting or anything at all to help me differentiate them. Sometimes I whip around, thinking I heard a familiar chuckle behind me. Distant rain is the only sound that is a constant companion, but even with it I’m able to hear an echo of every step I give. It unsettles me more with every minute that passes. Although I feel more in control of my body than before, my knees falter constantly and a sensation of tiredness slides over my mind. 

I find the snake painting just as I’d started to think I would be trapped here forever. 

It’s huge, and despite the years that have probably passed the scales still seem to shine. The head is painted in an angle that gives the illusion of the eyes following the person looking at it. It doesn’t help that the candle’s flames also make the snake look as if it’s moving. Stalking. Before noticing, I start hyperventilating. I shut my eyes close and turn away. Something is terribly wrong with me, I need to get out. 

Turning right, I start running. I cover my ears fearing that if I don’t, I’ll start hearing the snake’s hiss behind me. 

I cross an arch made with the same stone and stop right in my tracks upon realizing somehow I’m back at the room where we first arrived. I blink to adjust my eyes to the change of light, since here’s where all the electric lamps are. The room is empty though. 

I’m not sure of what I am supposed to do now. Sit and wait? Go out to the car?

While I’m weighing my options, trying to choose any that doesn’t imply dropping myself on the floor to have a panic attack, I hear murmurs and steps getting closer.

“Jude!” My little brother yells and runs to me. Behind him, Vivi scans me like she’s trying to find something wrong. I straighten my back and put on my best calmed face.

“Where were you?” She demands. “We lost you hours ago! Are you ok? You look pale.” 

Always such a mother hen, I sigh. “I’m fine. I fell behind and lost y’all. Then... I guessed it would be better to just… return here.”

I try not to frown at my last words, since I didn’t fully intend to say them. _You will not tell anybody about what you saw here._

“Jude knows how to take care of herself.” My father adds. I could hug him, but we’re not exactly the affectionate type. So I just flash him a smile.

Vivi does not look convinced but still stands down. “I guess so. The weather did a mess with your hair though.” A flash of Cardan’s fingers pulling from it to gain access to my neck sends a shiver through my body. Had that really happened just minutes before?

Before I can answer, Marrow calls for us. We turn to find her standing next to a big set of paintings that apparently were covered with a curtain. “You cannot leave without meeting the royal family.”

The canvases are ordered to mimic a family tree. A man with a severe expression rests at the very top. Eldred, I assume. Just by looking at it I feel judged. I can’t imagine what was like to actually live with him. The pictures of his wives look all so different but under them, their sons do have resemblance to one another. A weird sensation tickles my fingers as my gaze continues travelling over the paintings. Finally, I get to the last one. Once more, I cover my mouth to avoid an undesired sound.

Staring back at me I see Cardan. 

I don’t care if it’s a painting, there is no way I could not recognize those features. Those lips.

“A big family, I see.” Madoc’s words seem so far away.

Marrow hums in agreement. “The Greenbriars always felt proud of their vast offspring. Such attractive sons and daughters. It’s a shame the curse took most of their lives all those centuries ago.” 

“Did he…” I start, without knowing how to continue.

She approaches me to look at the canvas. “Ah, young master Cardan. He was the last one of Eldred’s children.” Then a frown appears on her face. “There was a lot of controversy regarding his death. Some say he died because of the curse, some others say he _was_ the curse. The books all have different versions.”

“That sounds creepy as fuck.” Vivi says. 

“Creepy as fuck.” My brother mimics her, the thoughtful expression on his face makes him look ridiculous. We cackle as Vivi shouts Oak he’s not supposed to say bad words.

By the time we get out of the castle the rain has decreased to a drizzle. 

Madoc carries Oak on his shoulders, listening to his non-stop squeals of excitement after visiting what he calls ‘a real vampire hideout’. This time, I don’t find the words to contradict him. Vivi is the first one to get to the car, shouting back some nonsense about the Greenbriars needing a protection hex. 

The moment I step down from the bridge something shifts in my head and I feel as if I had just woken up. 

Perhaps it is me who needs a protection spell after all. 

Before closing the car’s door, I turn to the castle one more time. Marrow and her husband wave at us from the front gate. 

A dull ache throbs on the base of my neck and my hand flies to the spot. I retrieve it and see blood staining my fingers. 

My heart misses a beat when I lift my gaze to the upper windows, where a tall figure with white shirt and dark hair is looking right back.


	2. In my dreams

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> My hand flies to my neck where a faint scar remains. If it weren't for that small piece of evidence, I would think I'm imagining the whole thing. But it’s there. It feels rough to the touch but at bare sight it's almost invisible. I'm still surprised at how fast it healed.
> 
> This can’t keep going. I can’t continue like this. So far, I’ve tried to convince myself it was nothing more than my mind playing tricks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Made for 'Secret Snusband gift exchange' hosted by Jurdannet on tumblr!!!
> 
> This one goes for my secret knife wife @fateandluminary!

_"Jude." His voice is so soft I can easily think it's the wind. "Jude."_

_My breathing is ragged and I'm once again in the middle of the corridor. It's cold. I look down where my silhouette is vaguely visible with the dim fire. My heart skips a beat when I notice another shadow next to it. I turn but there's nobody next to me or behind me. A soft chuckle caresses my ear._

_"Where are you?" I whisper._

_"I'm here." But I can't see him. "Can you feel me?"_

_Warmth spreads along my body. That feeling... I try to place it in my memory, but it slips away. I hear myself moan as hungry kisses travel down my neck. "You're mine now."_

I wake up gasping for air. I sit and look around, expecting to find myself in the castle, but I only see my messy desk and drawers. A drop of sweat trails down my chest, and my heart hammers in my ears.

My hand flies to my neck where a faint scar remains. If it weren't for that small piece of evidence, I would think I'm imagining the whole thing. But it’s there. It feels rough to the touch but at bare sight it's almost invisible. I'm still surprised at how fast it healed.

I sigh and rub my eyes. This can’t keep going. I can’t continue like this. So far, I’ve tried to convince myself it was nothing more than my mind playing tricks. That the creepy ambience of the castle and the mysterious aura of that man really affected me.

_Cardan._

Every time I think his name a shudder runs down my spine. Sometimes I think it’s fear, other times it’s something completely different and has a lot to do with the things we did. I’m not sure which one is stronger this time.

There's anger too.

I’m angry because I hate to feel that I’ve been tricked. I hate not having answers. I hate how blurry some of those memories are. Above all I hate the way it’s haunting me. I can’t sleep. I can’t have a normal day without having those intrusive sensations taking over me.

Sometimes I even wake up _wanting_ to be there. Wanting to have his lips against mine one more time. How dare he.

When it’s more than evident that I won’t be falling back asleep soon, I drag my feet to our small kitchen to prepare some tea. Maybe that will help.

The moment I open my eyes again I find Liliver’s face over mine. She’s giving me that look again. I sit up to realize I fell asleep on the couch.

“You look like shit.” She says, handing me a cup of coffee and pushing my legs to sit beside me.

I can imagine what she sees. Ruffled hair, dark circles under my eyes, pale skin. Nothing she hasn’t seen before in the time we’ve been roommates, especially after a night out.

I grunt and kick her playfully. “Shut up.”

“Bad dreams again?”

I hum, turning on the tv and taking a sip of coffee. I put whatever series I find first on Netflix, hoping to take her attention away.

Lil doesn't say anything else, but I know she's worried. She's been asking over and over if I feel alright, or if my ex-boyfriend has been texting me like the annoying rat he is.

I don't find the words to tell her _'Hey I think I met a vampire the other day, and he bit me while we fucked.'_ She would think I went nuts.

Maybe I have.

Liliver laughs at the screen where Blair Waldorf is about to fuck things up. Again. We’ve easily seen this series at least 3 times. And on every single one I’m amazed at how easily everything turns around. In a bad way. We can only hope it doesn’t happen to us in real life as well.

_I can feel him. His hands travel up my thighs and his breath is heavy in my ear. My name leaves his lips like a caress and my blood runs hot in my veins. I lean in, trying to get closer. Trying to feel his whole body against mine. Trying to feel more._

"Jude." A voice says. "Earth to Jude!"

I blink and turn to find Liliver looking at me with inquiring eyes. I groan. I've done it again. "What?"

She frowns. "You've been zoning out a lot lately."

I take a casual sip of my coffee and turn my gaze back to the tv where Serena is on her way to make everything worse.

"I have not."

She gives me her _oh really?_ look. I bite my lip. My head is pulsing.

It's normal for me to do that when work's eating me alive. My mind has to focus on a billion things at the same time. A thing that should not be happening now since the company has granted us a month of paid vacation due to some internal issues that are being solved.

It's also been two weeks since my father took us on his legendary hunting trip in hopes to lift my little brother's mood. A mission he accomplished since he's been sending vampire stuff to our family chat nonstop. I don't even know why he has a cellphone already.

The thing is, I'm the one who's struggling now trying to decide if what happened that day was real or not. When I dream of long corridors barely illuminated by dancing fires certainly feels like it is. I dream of feeling lost but at the same time eager. Like I want to reach something, but I usually wake up before really getting somewhere. 

It's becoming a bit annoying. And scary. 

Out of nowhere I’m startled by the sound of Liliver slamming the mug on the coffee table.

“You,” she says, pointing at me, “Are going to tell me _right now_ what the hell is going on.”

“Lil,” I sigh. “Not now.” God, I feel as if I have a hangover.

“Yes, now!” She takes the remote control from me and pauses the show. “I’m not a fool Jude. Whatever problem you’re facing is clearly eating you alive. And look, if you murdered someone it might be a little complicated, but I’ll help-”

Oh my god. “Liliver! Stop… Jesus… I haven’t killed anyone okay?”

“Oh.” Her face relaxes just a fraction. “Well, I mean, if it had been _you-know-who_ the one you murdered, you know I wouldn’t have any problem with it at all.”

I roll my eyes and take another sip of my mug.

“Then what is it?” She insists. Upon noticing my hesitation, she adds. “You’re my best friend Jude. You can trust me.”

“I think I met a vampire.”

There. It’s like taking off a band-aid. Quick, painless.

Lil stares at me in silence for a couple of seconds. She starts to say something but closes her mouth. I just hope she doesn’t think this has something to do with drugs.

“Before you say anything, I know I sound like I’m coked up, but please let me tell you the whole story,” I beg.

Her face doesn’t change, but she nods. I take a deep breath and start the story. She listens carefully despite it all, only interrupting a couple of times to ask for clarifications. I try not to blush when I get to the part where Cardan and I locked ourselves in that room. The way Liliver tries to suppress a smirk tells me how utterly I fail.

I tell her about the dreams. About the sensation of being pulled back to that place even when everything in my brain screams I shouldn’t. I tell her about how I zone out because I start to feel his hands on my skin again. I show her my scar.

When I’m done, my shoulders feel a little lighter. However, I’d somehow hoped saying it out loud would make me realize how stupid it is. Instead, it only makes more sense to me. I was bitten by a vampire.

“So…” She starts. Her words are slow as if trying to understand them better. “You’re trying to tell me that… You went on a trip with your family to look for lost mythical creatures. And you not only found one but also fucked that creature?”

“He bit me.”

“Yeah, whatever. And, after having your guts rearranged by said creature and being bitten by it… He let you go, and now you’re somehow being haunted by the memory of it… him?”

I grunt. Okay, maybe it does sound kind of stupid.

“Look, I know it sounds mental and you probably don’t believe me, it’s just…”

“You might be a lot of things Jude, but a liar is not one of them,” she says, surprising me. Her expression is still thoughtful, but at least it’s not judgy. “Well, either you found yourself the freakiest man in the whole country, or you definitely have some supernatural luck.”

I can’t believe my ears. “Luck?”

She gives me her conspiratorial smirk. “Are you going to tell me vampires are not good at fucking?” 

I cough, choking on my coffee. She has a point.

“You’re taking this with unnerving calm,” I point out. I would have expected a bigger reaction. Or to be dragged to a mental facility.

She shrugs. “You know I’ve tried to practice some witchcraft in the past. I might not be particularly good at it, but that should tell you I’m open minded to supernatural stuff.”

I wheeze. I’d almost forgotten about that. At some point during her first attempts, she almost lit the apartment on fire. Not because something witchy had actually happened, but she dropped some candles on the wrong place.

She laughs with me and lifts her hand but hesitates. “Can I… touch it?”

I push my hair aside and lead her hand to where my scar rests. Lil traces it for a moment before cursing under her breath. I nod.

“Wait, does this mean you’re becoming a vampire too?” She asks.

I pause. I hadn’t thought of that. “I don’t think so, I’m not… feeling different, at least not in _that_ way.”

The truth is I don’t even know how I would feel if I were turning into something else. I’m not sure what’s real anymore.

“I’m going back.” I mutter.

She freezes and pulls back. “You’re what? Jude, are you out of your mind?”

Probably. In fact, those words left my mouth half without my permission.

“I’m not 100% sure if I encountered a real vampire or just a…” I gesture with my hands. “Freak working at a castle. And whatever the answer is, I just want to know why I am having these weird dreams and how do I make all of this stop.”

“You just want another make out session, you perv-”

Her words die in her mouth as I throw a pillow at her with such force that she falls from the couch.

~

That afternoon, I convince Liliver to let me use her van. Technically I could get to the town by bus, but since the castle is in the middle of nowhere, there’s no way I can get there other than a car. It’s not the finest vehicle, but at least it has wheels and gas.

It’s winter so the road is a little icy. I need to drive carefully if I intend to arrive in one piece. I put on some loud music to distract myself from what I’m doing.

I just drive.

Three or four hours later and after stopping only once to eat something I finally recognize the surroundings. Some signs on the road, an old bridge. It’s not long before I take the exit we followed that day. My fingers tighten around the wheel. What on earth am I doing?

Another half an hour later I finally see it.

The castle is as impressive as the first time, its stone walls high and imponent. I stare at it for some minutes before convincing myself to get out of the car.

I pause just before the wooden bridge that goes to the main door. My heart is beating as if I just ran a marathon. I bit my lip and look up to the window where I saw Cardan for the last time. I only see darkness.

An icy wind shakes the trees around me, whistling between branches.

I clutch my jacket tighter around me.

The next thing that I know, I’m knocking as hard as I can on the door. Which is not much since the cold is biting me to the bone. I hear a faint echo coming from inside, but no answer. This is a terrible, terrible idea.

My eyes go up again, hoping to see some movement on the windows but there’s none. I notice tiny snowflakes starting to fall around me. Fucking great.

I huff and turn around. What exactly did I think it would happen? That I’d knock and Cardan would calmly open up and offer me some tea while he deeply apologized for his actions?

That’s when the door creaks, making me jump and whirl.

Standing on the door I see Marrow. Her gray hair is tied up now, making her face look stiffer than before. She’s frowning at me, probably not recognizing who I am.

“Good evening, dear,” she says. “You’re far from town. Is there something I can help you with?”

I hesitate, not sure anymore of what I should say. My lips are dry. Her eyes go from my feet to my face, squinting, then widen just a fraction.

“You’re the girl who came the other day.” It’s not a question.

“Yes.” My voice comes out weaker than I want it to be.

The way she smiles at my answer is kind, but for some reason it sends a chill through my veins.

“Well, well. Where are my manners? Please, come in.”

I could still turn around and leave. I could tell her it was a mistake and apologize. I could get out of there in the blink of an eye.

Instead, I follow her inside.

The place hasn’t changed much since the last time I visited. Even though I still can’t help but stare at it in awe. Every piece of it screams wealth. The fancy chandeliers, the complex carpets covering the floor. It also screams _Go away_. It takes me a moment to remember I’m here for real this time. It’s not another dream of mine.

Marrow clears her throat, bringing me back from my thoughts.

“It’s nice to see you again.” Her voice is soft. Calming. Totally the opposite of the surroundings.

“Thanks,” I mumble. “I’m sorry for showing up like this.”

“An uneasy mind can’t remain the same for too long. Am I right?”

I don’t like that she speaks as though she knows what I’m thinking. I hadn’t expected to see her at all. I hadn’t expected to actually have the door opened for me.

The sound of a honk outside startles me before I can come up with an answer.

“That’s just my husband,” Marrow says, dismissing it with a movement of her hand. “He comes to take me to the town.”

“Oh.” Apparently, I arrived at a bad time. “Then I guess I should be going, too.”

“There’s no need.” She smiles and grabs her purse from a nearby table. “I’ll be back in a couple of hours. It’s more than enough.”

I stare at her, trying to understand exactly what she’s suggesting.

“I have reasons to believe the questions you have are not suitable for me to answer,” she continues. “Make yourself at home Jude. If I’m honest, I’m surprised it took you this long to come back.”

With that, she turns and walks out of the place, leaving me alone.

For some seconds, the only thing I can hear is my breathing. White steam floating out of my mouth each time. This is absolutely not what I had in mind, but I guess it’s better not having her around. She’s already unnerved me enough.

The old stairs creak under my feet. Everything smells like humidity and dust.

As I walk among the antiques displayed, my attention is captured by the gorgeous set of daggers I noticed on my first visit. The fine blade looks sharp enough despite the years and the ruby-encrusted handles are like a siren call. Before I can think through what I’m doing, I open the cabinet and take one of them. If I’m adventuring inside a haunted castle I might as well carry some protection.

I walk past the bookshelf where I saw Cardan for the first time. The book I’d reached for that day is gone.

After some turns, I get to the spot where we entered the restricted section. I can hear the wind growing stronger outside. My palm is sweaty but my hold around the dagger tightens as I enter the corridor.

It feels like one of my dreams, except this time I’m well aware of my surroundings. Or at least I hope I am.

Nothing.

Not a sound. Not a movement. It’s like I’m roaming around an abandoned castle.

Then again, I know it’s not.

I swallow and clear my throat, already feeling stupid for what I’m about to do.

“Cardan?” I call. It sounds like a whisper. 

Taking a deep breath, I call for him again louder this time.

I catch a movement on the corner of my eye and turn around with a yelp.

Half hidden in the shadows, I find Cardan staring back at me. His expression is unreadable. He’s dressed in black and red this time, and for a moment I just admire how incredibly devastating he looks. That’s until I remember what I’ve come to do.

I lift the dagger and place a foot back in a defensive position. He remains still.

“Did not I tell you to leave this castle if you intended to stay alive?” He asks. His tone is colder than the weather outside. I shudder.

He gazes down to the hand that’s holding the dagger and to my horror, I realize it’s lightly shaking. I don’t answer.

He continues. “I assume you are not here to talk.”

“I have questions.”

The corner of his lips pulls up, and he starts walking towards me. No, around me, though he’s not looking at the weapon anymore. His gaze locks with mine. I feel like a rabbit being cornered by a snake.

“You bit me,” I accuse him.

“That’s not a question.”

I huff in frustration, scolding myself to put my ideas together. I’ve spent so many nights dreaming of coming after him, and yet I didn’t feel the tremor in my limbs I’m feeling now. I try to convince myself it’s only fear.

“You’re not human.”

“I never said I was.”

A rush of bravery storms through my body and I advance, pushing him back to the wall behind him. He lets me do it. Lets me put the blade to his neck. I frown. He doesn’t even try to defend himself. His face keeps that impassible mask and something like amusement shines in his eyes.

“Let me ask _you_ a question, Jude,” he purred. “If I am what you know deep down I am… Do you really think that dagger will be of any use to you?”

My eyes widen. A fraction of second it is _my_ back against the wall, not his. Despite the dagger still pressing into his skin, he doesn’t flinch. I let out a shuddering breath as he leans in, grazing my temple with his nose. No heat emanates from him, and still my body feels as if I am burning.

Then it clicks inside my brain.

It’s the same sensation I felt the moment he bit me. The same one I've been dreaming about every night since then. The same feeling that clouds my mind and makes me want to touch him again. He must sense something as well because he pulls back a little and stares at me with curious eyes.

Before I can stop myself, I lift my lips to his. He freezes for a second, my move catching him unprepared. Then, with a defeated growl he captures my mouth with hunger.

_Yes_ , something murmurs inside my head, _this is what you wanted_. _This is what you’ve been trying to come back to._

I try to grasp a coherent idea, but I fail.

His hands get hold of my waist and start a painfully slow roaming on my body, making me squirm under his touch. The next thing I know, his body is pressed flush against mine. His lips part from mine and trail a hot path down my neck. My breathing is ragged, I don’t even know how I’m still holding the dagger. I bury my other hand into his coal hair. Cardan moans against my skin and my hips buck in response. _You’re mine now._

He pauses and looks up. My core pulses as I face his feral expression. At this moment, I would agree to anything he asks. I would agree to be his if that meant he would keep touching me.

“What did you do to me?” I breathe.

He lets go of me and steps back, his face changes to a troubled expression. He’s breathing hard as well.

We stare at each other. He shakes his head with an uncertain movement. “I don’t know.”

My heart sinks at his response. This was supposed to end it. At least that’s what I thought, that seeing him again would release some of the anxiety creeping up on me these last weeks. I thought he would know what to do.

“You need to leave,” he says, his voice is lower now. Contained. “I do not know what… thing… changed after the last time we saw each other but if I- if I drink from you again, it will only be worse. You being here makes it worse.”

That doesn’t make any sense. Is he saying whatever this is, it’s affecting him as well? Does it mean something it’s actually changing inside of me?

“Am I,” I start, not sure of how to ask this. “Am I turning into a vampire then?”

He chuckles but his laugh sounds tired more than mocking. “No, that’s not how it works.”

Relief spreads inside me. At least that is okay, I hope.

“I have drunk from others before…” He goes on. “But it is not- the flavor…” His words are careful, as if he were struggling to find the best way to explain it. “They do not taste like you. My body is not reacting the same way. And right now, I am focusing so hard to not take you against that wall one more time.”

Heat creeps up, probably staining my cheeks. I don’t know why this is happening, and if he knows something else, he doesn’t say it.

Without another word, he grabs my hand and pulls me through the maze of passages until we’re back at the front hall.

That’s when I notice a raging noise I’ve been ignoring all along. Glancing through the window, I realize a snow is covering everything on my eyesight. I can barely distinguish Liliver’s van now, half of it already below the white surface. A cruel wind hits the trees mercilessly. I hear Cardan curse under his breath. The castle is in the middle of a snowstorm.

I turn to him and seeing his clenched jaw and fists, I realize that he’s arrived to the same conclusion as me.

My breath gets caught in my throat.

I won’t be able to leave. Not tonight. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M ALIVE!!!!!!
> 
> Thank you so much for your patience! I've had a rough couple of months and I'm barely catching up on my writing. 
> 
> Happy new year everyone!! My best wishes to all of you in this 2021 <3

**Author's Note:**

> I really hope you'd enjoyed this one!!!
> 
> Honestly, it was immensely fun to write and I really loved the result (even when I cost me a night without sleeping)
> 
> If you liked it please leave a comment! I might take ages, but will always answer!


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